In front of children it is better to avoid certain topics, especially those conversations that, without an adequate context, can be misinterpreted and cause confusion in children, especially since they will want to listen, and they are there, trying to understand what is being said.
Conversations that it is better to avoid in front of our children
You should not allow your children to receive more information than they can understand or handle on their own. Therefore, there are certain topics that are best avoided in front of them. When in doubt, it’s better than discussing it in private.
1. Talk bad about other people
If you want your children to respect you and others and themselves, then don’t talk bad about other people, even if you don’t like them or have done something to you that you consider negative. Save your arguments to discuss with another adult when the children are not around.
Of course, it’s normal not to get along with everyone, but that doesn’t mean you can’t speak respectfully about them, even if you don’t like them. It is not good to criticize, much less mention negative words or insults towards other people, whether they are present or not.
2. Avoid the worries of adults in front of children
If you have any kind of difficulty, for example, work, money or problems with other people, be careful what you say in front of children. Your children should grow up feeling safe and secure, knowing that you will do everything possible to keep them safe.
Therefore, if you want to explain something to them, you can, of course, but always measuring your words well and adapting them according to their age and ability to understand. In no case should you convey your adult concerns to them, because then you will be generating fears that they will not know how to digest.
3. Devalue adult tasks
If you don’t feel comfortable with your job, if you don’t like doing chores, etc., don’t devalue the things you do every day. Be careful not to talk grudgingly about your daily responsibilities. This can be dangerous because the child may understand that it is okay not to be motivated by anything. At the same time, they will have a hard time seeing the positive side of jobs and household chores, etc.
Another aspect to consider is that it can lead to undesirable apathetic behavior. Therefore, always try to find the positive side of things, even if they don’t motivate you too much.
4. Talking about children as if they are not listening
Perhaps they are absorbed playing or doing other things and you think that if you talk about them they will not listen to you. Don’t fall for this common mistake. It is important that you respect their identity and that you do not talk about them with other people, much less do it in a derogatory way. Also, don’t speak in code assuming they don’t understand you!
If you have to talk about a topic about your children with another adult, it is better to do it when the little ones are not around. If you do so, your children, in addition to being humiliated, will feel that you disrespect them and they will feel emotionally abandoned by your ignorance of their presence.
5. Avoid marital conflicts in front of children
It is common for couples to have moments of crisis or argue without thinking that their children are watching and listening to everything that happens. It is even more terrible to use children to hurt the partner.
In any case, if you have to argue with your partner or ex-partner, never do it in front of the children because you will be creating too much emotional insecurity, as well as a lot of unnecessary pain and suffering. No matter how much you want to argue, just think about your children and that they are more important than your runaway ego.