when you follow taking things personally, it can affect your well-being. It can make you feel judged or questioned, even when the other person never meant to offend you. These negative thoughts can be emotionally draining.
Someone may ask a harmless question or make a statement that makes you feel upset. Likewise, you may feel like the person thinks less of you. Any thought that goes through your mind will surely make you feel like a victim.
Sometimes you can even take it personally when someone is too busy to see you all the time. It can make you assume the worst, going so far as to think that someone doesn’t like you. However, reflecting on your behavior can help you stop taking things personally.
You can adapt some behaviors that allow you to stop taking things personally. Adopting these behaviors helps you develop and grow while simultaneously building your self-esteem.
Negative thoughts that make you take things personally
There are a few reasons why people continually take things personally. The reasons vary for everyone, but some include:
- being insecure
- misunderstand a conversation
- defensive attitude
- Feeling an attack on your character, skills or competence.
- Have diminished achievements
- Not being respected and being mistreated
While you can’t control what other people say and do, you can control how you react. Please do not blame yourself or make assumptions that you are the reason for your behavior. Whether the things they say are true or false, you can choose to ignore or internalize them.
When you internalize, it leads you to take things personally. However, ignoring the words allows you to push away negativity and self-limiting beliefs.
11 ways to stop taking things personally
Taking things personally can hinder your ability to pursue your goals or engage in your passions. Learning to let go helps you take control of your response, emotions, and energy level.
Create some space before taking things personally
When you feel offended, create some space before reacting. Allow yourself to calm down before returning to the situation. By doing so, you can avoid lashing out in anger, frustration, or pain.
Focus on self-compassion
Self-compassion can help you stop take things personally. When you’re hard on yourself, it’s easy to take offense at what another person says.
Change your internal dialogue from negative to positive thoughts
When you take someone’s statement personally, you often confirm a negative thought of your own. The words trigger you because you already feel inferior in that area of life. If this is you, it’s time to change your way of thinking and adjust your internal dialogue.
Instead of thinking of yourself as messy, think of yourself as creative. If you tell yourself that you are not a good cook, remember your other skills. While you can’t be good at everything, you can move from negative to positive thinking.
stay busy
When you have nothing to do, it’s easy to let your mind wander with negative thoughts and emotions. This negativity is often related to things that other people said to you or about you. Instead of letting your thoughts get the best of you, find ways to keep yourself busy.
Question your negative thoughts and beliefs
If you say hello to someone and they don’t respond, you might think it’s because they don’t like you. However, you should question that thought because you don’t know if it’s true.
Instead, the person may not have seen you or had time to recognize you. Or maybe they were lost in thought and didn’t even realize someone was greeting them. Your negative thoughts and beliefs lead to misunderstandings, causing you to take things personally.
Know yourself and your value
Knowing yourself and your worth will increase your confidence. It helps you understand who you are, allowing you to ignore comments that say otherwise. Knowing yourself helps you push negativity away instead of taking it personally.
When you know your worth, it stops you from believing what other people say about you.
Don’t respond with negative thoughts
When someone disrespects you, don’t respond in kind. Avoid more toxicity and negativity because it will make you part of the problem. It may make you feel good momentarily, but it will make you feel bad later.
If you can be mature and respond respectfully, it will help you stop taking things personally. You’ll also feel better about who you are, increasing your confidence.
Accept that not everyone will like you and that’s okay
Everyone is different, and that means that not everyone will like you. Nevertheless, don’t take it personally Because it’s not worth changing who you are. You can’t force everyone to like you, and you don’t need their approval.
Be assertive but kind
You can be friendly while remaining assertive. Many people believe that assertiveness is a way of being bad, but it is not true. Instead, it means standing up for yourself or something you care about.
If someone says untrue things about you, being assertive can put an end to it. Declare lies and half-truths for what they are, and make it clear that you have limits. It helps you regain control of the situation and your response processes.
Remember it’s not about you
When someone is insensitive and says harsh things, it’s often not about you. Sometimes a rude person may be having a bad day and take it out on whoever he can. Or, they may have issues with self-esteem and confidence and feel better about themselves when they’re mean to others.
Ask for clarification to avoid taking things personally
If you know the person well enough, speak up and ask for clarification. When she says something upsetting, it’s best to ask what she meant or intended. You may have misunderstood the situation and giving them a chance to explain can prevent future problems.
Final thoughts
Taking things personally can negatively affect your confidence levels and sense of self-esteem. It can also interfere with the progress you make toward your goals.
Instead of letting the words get you down, Learn to stop taking things personally.
Remember that often it’s not about you at all, and even when it is, it doesn’t change who you are. Let go of the things that bring you down and focus on all the good.